Frank M. Ahearn

Sextortion Expert & Privacy Consultant

Sometime in the mid-eighties while working for an investigative agency, I discovered I had a unique ability to pretext and social engineer; which is lying to extract private information. Eventually, I left my job and opened a skip tracing (finding people) service in some anonymous office in mid-town Manhattan. I spent my days pulling phone records, bank records, travel records, and any other document or file a client needed. My philosophy was, if you can afford it, I can obtain it.

The tools of social engineering made me a deadly skip tracer (finds people). Investigators, lawyers, insurance companies, tabloids, and others hired me to locate people worldwide. Again my philosophy was if you can afford it, I can find them. 

Somewhere in early 2000, I wrote an article, How to Disappear for an offshore website and it blew up. The next thing you know, I am the Dear Abby of disappearing. People from all parts of the world began contacting me about their privacy issues and need to vanish. I then authored a book, How to Disappear; which was published and became a New York Times Bestseller.

Somewhere along my road, I found myself in the romance scam and blackmail business. The romance scam involves identifying if a person is dating an online fraud or helping to recover stolen funds. The blackmail work is about getting the victim out of their precarious situation and creating disinformation to combat photo or video exposure.

Oddly, these professions all involve the use of deception. One could say is I use the negative, to battle the negative to obtain a positive outcome. If I can be of help, do not hesitate to ask. 

Frank M. Ahearn

Think Before You Act

If You Pay

The blackmailer will try to bleed you dry.

If You Do Not Pay

They may or may not release the material.

Assess The Situation

What do they know about you? 

Slow Down

Think with you head, not your emotions.

Short Term Action

Shut down your online information.

Long Term Action

Damage control.

What Do They Know?

What They Know Determines The Strategy

  • Did you send a video or photo?
  • Did you involve yourself on camera?
  • Is it a face photo?
  • Is the background identifiable?
  • Do they know your name?
  • Do they have your mobile number?
  • Do they have your email address?
  • Do they know your social media?
  • Do they know your employment?
  • Do they know your family?

Protecting Against Sextortion


Privacy Consultation (SE)

Pay with PayPal or a debit/credit card

Most sextortionist want a quick payment, and so they promise they will destroy everything after the funds are received. Paying a sextortionist never works out in your favor, and it will only be a matter of time before you have no choice but to say no. However, there are right and wrong ways to say no. 

I embrace the strategy of avoidance, which gives me time to assess the seriousness of the scammer. Plus, it brings us in the direction of you not saying no but squeaking out of the situation without sending money.

After you prepay the consultation, email me at and let me know how you want to communicate, email, phone, WhatsApp, or video. 

Damage Control

Digital Disinformation

Sextortionist do not always go away, much of the times they lay low, and resurface. Therefore, you must consider long term protection and damage control. Especially is they have information like your mobile number, email address, social sites, employment, or information about your friends and family. The strategy of digital disinformation protects you from potential disaster.  

Books By Frank M. Ahearn

How to Disappear

frank m. ahearn how to disappear.

Spurlos verschwinden

Frank M. Ahearn

Sextortion Blog